Friday, September 16, 2011

Will the real me please stand?

Anyone who believes the statistic that only one percent of the population suffers from multiple personality disorder has never tried to be a parent, worker, spouse, bread-winner, cried on shoulder, best friend, junior league sports coach, dutiful child, Scout leader, bill payer, church goer, "one of the guys/girls", and engage in one or more of a zillion hobbies we can consumed by.

At work one beautiful day a gentleman who serves as a mentor/managers asked me "What do you enjoy doing?" His question was designed to get me clear on career goals and I sadly must admit to gasping like a fish out of water. My career has been "whatever needs doing" for so long that I couldn't really remember what I truly enjoyed.

That got me thinking, and reading, and studying. Soon I realized that I had been doing the "whatever needs doing" in my hobbies, relationships, and spare time. Things I once enjoyed were now just items on a rather long task list. Decent money has been spent on things that I thought I should be doing or sensed there was some vague need for.

Oh Lord, "I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made..." (Psalm 139:14a)  Now, uh, Lord, who am I?

Lest you think have hard evidence that I am totally crackers, go back to the first paragraph and see how many personalities you are expected to fill. I probably missed a score or two and you can fill in the blanks. Go on, give it a try! I bet you can come up with at least a dozen things you're expected to be in the course of the next couple weeks. Are there enough hours in the week to give each of these roles half a day and still go to work and get any sleep?

So here is the challenge; to find out what I really am created to enjoy. Who is the real me and where did all these other shadows of me come from? How many are expectations because I didn't say "no" to a volunteer assignment. Or something was broken and no one else was working on it.

Who am I, really...and who are you?

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